Take Me Deeper...

"Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander, and my faith would be made stronger..." (Oceans)
"Lord, whatever comes my way, I can trust you..." (Sovereign)

I have pondered these lyrics a lot lately. In the song Oceans by Hillsong, there are some deeply challenging lyrics. I love deep songs. But I have been singing these lyrics with a great idea of what this could mean. When I tell God that I'll trust Him whatever comes my way, it's a hard statement to sing.

I think it is easy to sing these lyrics, lyrics that say "Hey God, I'm willing to go wherever you lead". Do we really, truly consider where He could lead us? I've LOVED the lyrics "take me deeper than my feet could ever wander" because I feel like that is what happened to me over the last few months. God truly has stretched my faith and taken it far deeper than I could have ever gone on my own. The thing is: it took probably the biggest trial of my life to take me to this depth.

On one hand, I wouldn't go back and choose to not experience this because God has truly taken me deep in faith and relationship with Him. He's taken my faith places I never could have imagined to go by myself. I've heard His voice like never before and felt His arms like never before. I'm more in love with Him than ever before, I love that and I'm thankful for it.

But let's rewind to say, December 2012. If God would have sat me down and said hey- I'm going to take your faith deeper and this is how I'm going to do it- I'm not sure I would have agreed to it. I would have probably said no, my life is okay the way it is, I'll go a different direction. I seriously don't know if I would have stepped out on faith knowing what the future held.

I'm not sure that even makes sense... I wouldn't change it if I could, but I'm not sure I would have chosen it had I known.

Here's the thing though: I sing those lyrics with hesitation and yet a lot of confidence. I hesitate because I know the pain and discomfort it might bring in to my life. I know what it might mean. It might mean I suffer through more pain than I've already suffered. It might mean I won't. But frankly, faith does not come easy. Faith does not come to those who are never challenged, those who never experience loss. I don't believe faith comes in the good times. Our faith from the bad times allows us to coast and have the good times. The testing of our faith produces perseverance, perseverance makes us mature, complete, not lacking anything (James 1). So in the same sentence that I sing with hesitation knowing God might lead me straight back in to the fire, I have confidence that the fire will take my faith and strength deeper than I ever could have wandered by myself.

It is this to me: being scared yet confident in how God works... fully believing that wherever He leads me: through the fire, into the depths of the ocean, into the desert- He works all things for good and for His glory and there is nothing more important in my life than for my life to bring Him glory.